Slow and Steady....

After dusting the cobwebs off my keyboard.. I am finally writing a new post!  It's been a challenging few months since the show in September.  I have joined a new team which I am absolutely loving but mentally I am stressed.  The scale is moving up which is inevitable after a show but what is the normal amount of weight to gain?

I can tell you that there are many different factors that are playing into Mr. Scale heading north and they are as follows:

Nutrition - I don't know what it is lately but I feel like I have the appetite of a truck driver!  I eat my 6 meals a day as that has become a habit but on the weekends I just want to eat sweets and A LOT of them.

Holidays:  This is no excuse but let's be honest here...Holiday party after holiday party can really be a pain in the ass.  This is my "off season" so to speak and I really don't feel like sitting in the corner at the holiday party sipping on my water and veggies...so I haven't been.  I have indulged with a few glasses on wine and treats.

Lifting:  I am loving my new weight training program and aiming to put on some lean muscle.  I have never really attempting to add muscle before so I can tell I am getting bigger but I am not sure if it's good or bad...it's kind of freaking me out.

Cardio: Cardio is really my least favorite thing to do...when I look at the long line of people waiting to use an elliptical or treadmill I want to turn around and go home.  I would much rather just lift but I know I need a certain amount of cardio in my routine. Lately, I have not been AS good with my HIITs and steady state.  Thankfully my trainer has been adding an extra 30 min Tabata session after my full body Saturday workout for the month of December! 

All of these factors are coming into play and for someone who was so restrictive for months it can be overwhelming.  I don't hate what I see in the mirror but when you are used to seeing these cut abs and they are not really there anymore...it's mentally screwy..if that makes sense.  I absolutely loved competing but I am realizing that there is a lot of mental aftermath that you need to deal with.  Self-image can be real mind F%$&..excuse my language.  Having all of this emphasis placed on what you look like can be a lot of pressure.  Even in this "off season" where you can let your guard down a little..I am constantly stressed out about food and making sure I get in my workouts.  Sometimes I have to remind myself that THIS IS FOR FUN.  There are a lot more serious things going on in the world than whether I have gained a lb. 

My next show is set for April.  I think I need to just make it through the Holidays and then hopefully I will get out of this fog I am currently in. 

These are some progress pics I have taken within the past 3 months.  You be the judge...any muscle growth going on? I am really hoping that having done a show before will prepare me for this next deadline mentally and physically.